All the World is Stages


What? You’ve got to be kidding! There’s no way that broke the skin! That can’t be my blood!


Why the hell did Clipboard have to send us out here today? It was seventy-first’s turn on the rotation! All for an already-ransacked convenience mart. When are they going to get their shit together? Why do I gotta be the one to pay for his screwups?


If I don’t turn, I’m going to talk to Father Tutumbo. I got to give some of those ration coupons to someone who needs ’em more than I do. I’m a good person, but I could be so much better. I just need a few more years. A few more months. Weeks. Anything.


Ah well, what the hell. It’s not like there’s anything to live for around here anyway. All this so I can look forward to January? Forget it.


“Hey, Jerry. You coming or going?”

“I think I’m going to take off.”

“Want us to tell them anything?”

“Yeah. Tell ’em everything’s shiny. It doesn’t even hurt.”



“Good Luck.”

“Yeah. You too.”

6 Responses to “All the World is Stages”

  • You forgot stage #6 – The moaning.

  • stage #7, Redeath

    • Ryan,

      Capitals, capitals! We’ve got Brits reading this site, and we don’t want them looking down on us for what we’re doing to their language!

      (Hey JayHeAd, is “Brits” a derogatory term? If so, sorry. It’s pronounced “Tommys”.)

      It’s supposed to refer to the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Chris and your brother added to new stages that pre-outbreak social scientists (or the author) never had to worry about. I wanted to show that in a zombie world, what used to take months takes a couple of minutes due to the shock. It’s also a pun on what Shakespeare wrote in As You Like It:

      All the world’s a stage,
      And all the men and women merely players…

  • Dave is going to have fun once you get up to the high school Ryan.

  • Ha, Brits is fine, I was more upset by the lack of capitals! or wuz i?
    Your stages of grief is a really interesting concept, I wonder what other kinds of psychological processes would be affected in this scenario?
    It would stand to reason that the massive stress and threat levels of life in the zone would lead to some pretty off-the-wall behaviour…

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.