Ha-Ha, You’re Dead!

We ran in such a panic. It was scary.  The monsters kept growing in numbers and circling us.  There was no place to run to, and I didn’t know where to go!

I closed my eyes and covered my head with my arms.  Then Amelia hit my head really hard and yelled “HA HA! YOU’RE DEAD!”

I started to cry.  Not only did I just lose, but my head really hurts.  I miss my Mommy and Daddy.  I want to go home. I hate these other kids. They’re so mean to me.

6 responses to “Ha-Ha, You’re Dead!”

  1. I kind of got bored. I really like these short stories that don’t have much to do with the actual zombies, and more on the people in the zone. I want to know about the other conflicts that are being faced by these unnamed survivors, and what they’re doing to survive, and live life as well as they can. I have another in the process, but it’s kind of strange. Gangs in the zone, one for good and the other for evil. Haha. Opinions are necessary, please.

  2. I thought that when someone speaks it is its own seperate paragraph or if not dont worry about me.

    Good job but you shouldnt right stories just because you are bored put thought into them I know this sounds hypocritical coming from me but do not just make stories cause you feel like it write and treat your writing like a masterpiece.

  3. I usually don’t write short-short retarded stories when I write, Jared. And I know about the the speaking, but I wanted it to seem more childish with the wrong grammar and stuff, you smell what I’m stepping in? and whenever I’m bored I always write, and only when I’m bored. I was going to make this much more stretched out with a twisted ending, but I didn’t want to.

    Me and Dave are Brain-twins, we carry the same scary thoughts and ideas, this isn’t the first time this has happened. *sigh*.

  4. I edited out the grammar. I was tempted to change it to Ha Ha You’re Undead to make it more like a game of zombie tag, but I decided that was too drastic a change and wanted to make it as a suggestion rather than an order.

    If you want to make this more obviously like a game of zombie tag, I’d have the little girl drop her stick at the beginning of paragraph 2 and make the bigger child moan and shuffle off hunting for more victims.

    Let me know when you’re ready for a final pass over before moving this to category one.

  5. This is an awesome Idea, I really like it. For children born after the outbreak, they would be completely acclimatised to life not just in the Zone, but life in a world where Zed was commonplace. Sweet!

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